I went quiet. Here’s why.

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Hey folks,

I owe you an apology.

My last email here went out on 27th December, and then I did the classic creator thing where you think, “I’ll send the next one this week,” and suddenly it’s a month later and you’re staring at your drafts folder like it’s a crime scene.

I’ve been dealing with a lot. Some personal. Some business. Some “what the hell is happening in the world” energy that makes you want to close every tab and go live in a forest with a kettle and zero notifications.

So here’s the honest update.

I run a content marketing agency for B2B brands, mostly SaaS. October 2025 hit hard. Two large enterprise clients I’d worked with for about 3.5 years moved away from organic content and decided to use AI agents to write for them. That shift wasn’t theoretical anymore. It was my revenue, my team, my plans for the year. The last quarter was rough.

And it forced a question I didn’t want to ask at this stage of life.

What am I actually building next?

I dropped out of my MBA in 2016 because I wanted to write. For an introvert, writing wasn’t “a passion.”

It was a way out of having nothing.

It gave me a life.

It helped me meet my wife.

It gave me access to people and experiences I would never have touched otherwise.

So watching the content world get shaken up with layoffs, AI-everywhere content, and “good enough” becoming the new standard… it messed with me.

Badly.

That’s also why I started thinking seriously about pivoting.

Instead of doing only SaaS content, I began moving into personal branding for B2B founders and coaches, mostly on LinkedIn and newsletters.

The logic was simple.

If companies are going to flood the world with machine-made content, the only thing that stays scarce is a real voice with real lived experience.

In January, I signed two clients. Two coaches. One wellness coach. One relationship coach.

My process with them is basically journalism mixed with therapy mixed with mild interrogation.

Every week, I interview them for 45–90 minutes. I don’t ask, “What content pillars do you want?” because that makes people perform. I ask things like:

• What’s working in your industry that nobody wants to admit

• What’s one take you have that your peers would hate

• What do beginners keep doing that drives you insane

• What’s a before-and-after transformation you’ve seen with clients that actually changed someone’s life

I want the real person. The texture. The tone. The stuff they say when they stop trying to sound impressive.

That part was starting to click.

And then depression walked back into the room like an old friend who doesn’t knock.

The last time I had psychotic depression that bad was in 2017. Back then I couldn’t get out of bed for 14 hours at a time.

This time is different because I’m married, I have responsibilities, and life doesn’t pause just because your brain decides to turn everything into a foggy nightmare.

I’ve lost over 10 kilos in under two months.

I’m sleeping badly.

I wake up with palpitations.

I’m on meds.

Conversations feel heavy. Simple things feel hard.

And the part that hits my ego the most is this.

I’ve always been the “solutions guy.”

School, sports, exams, work. I was the person people came to when they wanted an answer fast. Somewhere along the line, I built my identity around being competent and quick.

Right now, I’m in a place where I genuinely don’t know the “quick solution.” I’m learning acceptance the hard way, and I hate how slow it is.

There’s another layer too. When I look back at my agency journey, I can see one mistake clearly.

I didn’t market enough.

We got a lot of clients through referrals and inbound. People liked the work. So I kept my head down and did the work and assumed that would be enough.

It’s not enough anymore.

If people don’t know who you are, they can’t buy from you. They can’t refer you. They can’t even remember you exist.

Which is ironic because I started this Substack for introverted people. People who struggle to take up space. People who can’t “work the room” or start conversations easily.

That’s me.

I’m not a natural conversational starter.

I can hold a conversation beautifully once it begins, but the “hello hi how are you” opening moves feel like trying to start a car with a spoon.

I’ve trained myself over the years, but it still doesn’t come easy. That bled into my professional life too.

And on top of everything else, in October 2025, my business partner and I had to part ways after seven years running the business.

She lost her vision due to domestic abuse, and life just… broke a lot of things in a short period.

So yeah. That’s the month.

Also, to prove I’m still a person with normal human habits, I’ve been reading a lot of fiction lately.

Currently I’m reading The Only One Left by Riley Sager, which is exactly the kind of book you read at night and then regret because now every creak in your house sounds like a murderer doing warm-ups.

The bigger world hasn’t helped either.

Everything feels loud. Politics. Wars. Layoffs. Volatility. People burning out. The constant sense that you’re supposed to “keep up” while your nervous system is begging you to stop.

If you feel overwhelmed, it’s not because you’re weak. It’s because the last few years have been insane.

I’ve lost two friends to massive heart attacks in 2025. I have friends who got laid off. My mother is very sick. Diabetes, kidneys, the long slow grind of it. And I’m in one of the worst depression phases I’ve had in years.

Some days I want to disappear.

But writing has saved my life before, and I’m betting it can save it again.

So here’s what I’m doing.

I’m going to keep writing here. More regularly. Not because I’ve magically “fixed” anything but because it’s the one thing that has consistently helped me make sense of myself and the world.

If you’re going through something hard right now, please don’t compare your pace to someone else’s highlight reel. If it takes three days, it takes three days. If it takes three years, it takes three years. Your body and mind are yours. Respect them. Get help if you need it. Keep your people close.

And if you ever feel like you need someone to just listen, reply to this. Seriously.

Also, a small ask.

If you know anyone who wants their newsletters written in a fully human voice (no AI slop) or wants interview-based LinkedIn posts that actually sound like them and help generate leads for their business, send them my way. My LinkedIn is linked in the bio.

That kind of work is what I’m building now quietly with a lot of stubbornness and a bit of caffeine.

Thanks for sticking around even when I went silent.

I’m still here.

Aritra

PS: If anything I shared here hits close to home and you’re in a dark place, please don’t handle it alone. Reach out to someone you trust, or a mental health professional. If you feel unsafe, contact local emergency services. If you’re in the US, you can call or text 988. If you’re in the UK & Ireland, Samaritans 116 123 is there 24/7.